“Ask the Expert: ‘Should I buy two engagement rings?!’” |
| Ask the Expert: ‘Should I buy two engagement rings?!’ Posted: 18 Nov 2010 02:42 PM PST Stumped on when to send out your STDs (save-the-date announcements)? Don't know who should be invited to your rehearsal dinner? Get the answers to all your etiquette questions for your gay wedding by submitting your dilemma to etiquette@equallywed.com. Q Do you have any advice on the process for getting/giving engagement rings? I am planning to surprise my girlfriend, but would sort of like to have a "souvenir" of the moment as well. Would it be crass to buy an extra one (for her to give me)? Should I just wait for her to buy me one? Or does anything go? A When you say souvenir, I'm wondering if you really just want something to remember the proposal by or if this is your way of fishing for an engagement ring, too. It's perfectly normal and acceptable to want one, too. But tricking your girlfriend into giving you one isn't how I'd go about it. She might be planning her own proposal to you, in which case you'd be taking something away from her by assuming you had to go out and buy your own ring. If you're the type of gal who wants the world to know she's engaged by looking at her ring finger (and not every woman is), then give her the benefit of the doubt that she's got something up her sleeve, too. I'd suggest giving her the best proposal you can dream up, and having someone (a shutterbug friend or a pro photog) to snap photos for your "souvenir." Consider the sparkler on your new fiancée's finger as a souvenir, too—you'll be together forever, after all, so you can look at it whenever you want. Then, if she wants to propose to you, she'll come up with how to do it in her own special way—with the ring of her choosing. Kirsten Palladino is the editor in chief of Equally Wed, the nation's premier same-sex wedding magazine, online at http://www.equallywed.com. Equally Wed offers gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer couples a guide to their weddings, a social community and a marketplace of vetted LGBT-friendly wedding vendors. Follow Equally Wed on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/equallywed.
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